Chris I feel with you. We need to have in mind that computer games are not perfect and will never be, there always be some flaws of the game, for someone some things for other something different. If you scroll with in this thread you will notice that some guys love the game a lot and for some others this game is just not for them. I was thinking why is that? I will speak from my perspective so this is my opinion and should not be true for everyone...
I am a pes player for my whole life, I have bought fifa three times in my life, 16, 17 and now 18. In the past I can`t imagine my self playing fifa at all becouse I don`t like the way that game plays becouse it doesn`t have soul for me. Bought fifa 16 becouse I fell in love with the demo and becouse I was angry at konami releasing pes 16 with weird animations and stupid goals, btw didn`t bought pes 16. For fifa 17 I just bought it just for curiosity and only thing I don`t like about it was running of the players and sometimes difficulties to defend. And now becomes pes that konami have worked three years on it... I am really dissapointed with the direction they are going with pes and their perspective. If you played pes in the past you can see some animations form ps1 days which is ridiculous. Passing with outside of the foot 80% of the time and other similar animations. For three years you can develope game from scratch and just implement some things but the base should be stable which isn`t the case in pes so I just stop here speaking for pes becouse this post isn`t about that.
Fifa on the other hand found the magical formula with fifa 14 on new consoles and now with frostbite making it`s steps to the glory again. It isn`t perfect game and will never be! There are flaws that users report but in the end everyone of us here plays the game in his own way and have some expectations before playing the game which isn`t fair if you want to judge the game after that. We should accept the flaws if we want to enjoy the game more. Exhibition games in fifa and carrer games are not the same as in pes. Started carrer with Man Utd and suddenly I start to see more fouls against me and games are more varied, but this is in my perspective so it shouldn`t apply for others.
I want to say, we don`t have football game these days that simulates the sport, both of the games just play like football and I am afraid with the audience and needs to make money and have more youtube views we are far far away from simualtion but on the other hand games are fun. To be honest this years fifa has long learning curve, it`s not easy as users report if you play manual not just about difficulties in passing but AI plays different when you play manual.
Enjoy the game for what it is and don`t make pressure on you, enjoy the good things about it and you can`t see in pes. I hope the game will settle for you in the end becouse I know you are trying really hard to enjoy it from what I read

Cheers!