The 'Things That Piss Me Off' Thread

marukomu said:
Bursting for a shit and not making it home in time.
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I had severe gastroenteritis once in Turkey, it was so bad I got delirious and tried to cut my leg off at one point.
Anyway it started when we were out in the middle of nowhere and we were driving around in a battered Jeep, we stopped at this lovely secluded beach.
I was walking back up to the Jeep and felt a bad pain in my gut that had been iffy for most of the afternoon or so, I then felt my leg get hot and my partner shrieked, I looked down and I was standing in a growing puddle of bottom juice and blood, it was flowing down my leg, I just stood there like a chocolate fountain ... :LOL:
 
Nick Cave said:
I had severe gastroenteritis once in Turkey, it was so bad I got delirious and tried to cut my leg off at one point.
Anyway it started when we were out in the middle of nowhere and we were driving around in a battered Jeep, we stopped at this lovely secluded beach.
I was walking back up to the Jeep and felt a bad pain in my gut that had been iffy for most of the afternoon or so, I then felt my leg get hot and my partner shrieked, I looked down and I was standing in a growing puddle of bottom juice and blood, it was flowing down my leg, I just stood there like a chocolate fountain ... :LOL:
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:LMAO: Lucky girl, I did it in work once and had to side step to the toilet and chuck my undercrackers in the bin.
 
Dar said:
Thats overpriced?! :CONFUSE:

I can get a room in a house share for that price a month here. :( Stupid cost of living.

Main thing thats pissing me off at the moment is the economy. The worse that gets the busier I get. :RANT:
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Wow where the hell do you live?! :CONFUSE:
 
Nick Cave said:
I had severe gastroenteritis once in Turkey, it was so bad I got delirious and tried to cut my leg off at one point.
Anyway it started when we were out in the middle of nowhere and we were driving around in a battered Jeep, we stopped at this lovely secluded beach.
I was walking back up to the Jeep and felt a bad pain in my gut that had been iffy for most of the afternoon or so, I then felt my leg get hot and my partner shrieked, I looked down and I was standing in a growing puddle of bottom juice and blood, it was flowing down my leg, I just stood there like a chocolate fountain ... :LOL:
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Had that in Thailand. I had to go to hospital as it was just unbearable pain.
 
New Year's Day about 10 years ago, I was stood outside Debenham's in Manchester and was bursting for a shit. All the shops were shut, so I decided to walk down towards St. Peter's Square because I knew there were some pubs that would be open. I got just past the job centre and I was touching cloth. I had to sit on a few walls for a few seconds to try and hold it, and then walk a few meters with my arse cheeks clenched. After a few minutes and no little effort, I got to the City Road pub and luckily the side door was open. At this point, I could feel it coming out and I had absolutely no strength left to hold it in any more. I burst through the side door and got into the cubicle and pulled my kecks and undies down as it was coming out. As I sat down, this huge torpedo shot from my anus, but thank fuck I had made it.
I sat there for a few minutes with the most intense feeling of relief in my life thinking about what I would have done if I'd shit myself in the centre of Manchester. My undies were fucked so I threw them in the corner. The stench was fuckin' staggering. After twenty minutes and half a bog roll, I finally stood up and pull up my jeans. As I turned round to see the damgage, I realised the reason for the bad smell. My torpedo had come out with such a force that it actually missed the bowl and landed on the back of the toilet.
As you can imagine, I made my excuses and left.
I always had a small chuckle whenever I walked past that pub, as I noticed that the side door was locked from then on.
 
marukomu said:
New Year's Day about 10 years ago, I was stood outside Debenham's in Manchester and was bursting for a shit. All the shops were shut, so I decided to walk down towards St. Peter's Square because I knew there were some pubs that would be open. I got just past the job centre and I was touching cloth. I had to sit on a few walls for a few seconds to try and hold it, and then walk a few meters with my arse cheeks clenched. After a few minutes and no little effort, I got to the City Road pub and luckily the side door was open. At this point, I could feel it coming out and I had absolutely no strength left to hold it in any more. I burst through the side door and got into the cubicle and pulled my kecks and undies down as it was coming out. As I sat down, this huge torpedo shot from my anus, but thank fuck I had made it.
I sat there for a few minutes with the most intense feeling of relief in my life thinking about what I would have done if I'd shit myself in the centre of Manchester. My undies were fucked so I threw them in the corner. The stench was fuckin' staggering. After twenty minutes and half a bog roll, I finally stood up and pull up my jeans. As I turned round to see the damgage, I realised the reason for the bad smell. My torpedo had come out with such a force that it actually missed the bowl and landed on the back of the toilet.
As you can imagine, I made my excuses and left.
I always had a small chuckle whenever I walked past that pub, as I noticed that the side door was locked from then on.
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:LMAO: :LMAO:

Best page on the thread!
 
actually - thats if i can be bothered to answer the phone. I normally let the machine get it. It does piss me off though when someone rings you and then lets it ring but they refuse to leave a message (whats the point in not?!)
My motto is, if its that important they'll call back and leave a message. hasnt failed me yet aha
 
Nick Cave said:
Damn cold calling sales, I must get 5 a day who just hang up when the answer phone kicks in...
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YES. I get this every fucking day, it's got to the point where I unplug the phone for most of the day and only plug it in when I need it to call someone. It's fucking stupid. It only ever started since we had to change our phone number a few months ago, it's like BT have given us some number of a person who was registered with all sorts of crap. But here is the best bit- as well as those sales calls, we keep getting this person call us who doesn't speak English, sounds African or something, but he always shouts down the phone as soon as you answer and the fucker always withholds his number. So we call BT to ask if we can block withheld numbers [the sales calls are usually withheld too you see] but they say I'd have to pay about £15 a month for it!! Cheeky bastards, we can't afford to plus why should we because it's pretty much harassment we're getting AND it's BT who gave us the shit number.
 
Yana said:
But here is the best bit- as well as those sales calls, we keep getting this person call us who doesn't speak English, sounds African or something, but he always shouts down the phone as soon as you answer and the fucker always withholds his number.
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fonejacker.jpg
 
Yana said:
YES. I get this every fucking day, it's got to the point where I unplug the phone for most of the day and only plug it in when I need it to call someone. It's fucking stupid. It only ever started since we had to change our phone number a few months ago, it's like BT have given us some number of a person who was registered with all sorts of crap. But here is the best bit- as well as those sales calls, we keep getting this person call us who doesn't speak English, sounds African or something, but he always shouts down the phone as soon as you answer and the fucker always withholds his number. So we call BT to ask if we can block withheld numbers [the sales calls are usually withheld too you see] but they say I'd have to pay about £15 a month for it!! Cheeky bastards, we can't afford to plus why should we because it's pretty much harassment we're getting AND it's BT who gave us the shit number.
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cant you go X-directory or whatever?
 
We are ex-directory, always have been always will be.... Yet I get these cunts.

LOL @ George Agdgdgwngo, but he can speak English, the guy who calls us can't even say hello. :P
 
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Yana said:
We are ex-directory, always have been always will be.... Yet I get these cunts.

LOL @ George Agdgdgwngo, but he can speak English, the guy who calls us can't even say hello. :P
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you'd think he'd get the point by now.

maybe he thinks one day you'll magically be able to speak his language and be best friends OR maybe hes actually trying to teach you his language over the phone but you keep putting it down on him
 
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