The script in PES can be unnerving, it's true. I remember it in the old Winning Eleven games on PlayStation 2. Until they scored a goal, they wouldn't let you touch the ball. When they finally scored, they'd calm down and you could start dribbling a bit.
The referee is terrible, you're right. I play PES 2018 because, despite everything, it's the game that gives me the most excitement when dribbling.
Play PES 21 for a few days, then get PES 18 and you'll discover it's a whole different beast! That's why every time I try to get into PES 21, I then, out of nostalgia, play a game of PES 18, and in the end I go back to 2018.
For a week now, I've been tweaking and testing DT18 to increase the fouls, thanks also to AI. I'm on the right track...