Joe
International
- 9 August 2004
You rise, you fall
Your down then you rise again
What dont kill you makes you more strong
Through black days
Through black nights
Through pitch black insights
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You rise, you fall
Your down then you rise again
What dont kill you makes you more strong
Through black days
Through black nights
Through pitch black insights
It's not as bad as it sounds mate, my other half put the labels on me... I would be up and down like a yo yo, it would get so my ups and downs were massive some days.
There'd be no real reasons for them either, I guess DJing and that whole life style didn't help, I'd be doing four or more nights a week sometimes 7pm - 4 or 5am and then I had a couple of day jobs...
Lets just say Red Bull was not enough to keep me going, a change of career and lifestyle have evened me out somewhat...
Sometimes I think about killing myself. Not in a suicidal way.
Like killing yourself and wondering what it's like dying and seing what people think about you. Well, that's if you die and come back as a ghost...
In all seriousness, you should try and get your hands on a copy of the 70's British comedy series "The Fall and Rise of Reginald Perrin". It's based on this concept and is one of my fave shows of all time
In all seriousness, you should try and get your hands on a copy of the 70's British comedy series "The Fall and Rise of Reginald Perrin". It's based on this concept and is one of my fave shows of all time
I feel down quite a lot of the time. Sometimes I feel like I'm not good enough for anyone and it gets to me a lot of the time. I look around me at school and everyone seems to be perfect and have these amazing lives. Perfect bodies, perfect style etc. I always seem to be attempting to catch up with them. I've not had the best of luck with girls, at all. My parents split a few years ago and I'm still not properly over the fact that they've both moved on. I'll have times where everyone seems fine but it'll just all rush back to me in the end. Some of you might take the piss and say, "you're only 16" and "you've not seen the worst of it" etc. But for me, I'm consistently down about things. I try and bring myself back with music but something will get to me again. I hate myself.
I hate myself.
I tell you what, girls depress me.
Especially with having a lisp, and effed up teeth. Puts your confidence right off, and means I never say a word when I like a girl. It's a shame really cause I can be really friendly with them, flirting is fine with me cause I can just roll off innuendos on what they say, but if it gets to the point where I decide I actually want to do something with them, the first thing they do thats slightly annoying means I say something about it and end up falling out with them.
That depresses me, especially knowing/thinking it'll always be the same, or maybe it's just a teenage thing?
Makes things worse when your best mates, or other mates get girlfriends, makes the thoughts about the lisp and the teeth ever present in my head, and it's even worse when I go out drinking with them, knowing you're not gonna be noticed by girls, and never feeling bothered to say anything to any of them (though thats alright 'cause meeting and then pulling girls on a night out is simply an ego booster in my eyes)
I do know if I don't have a wife/girlfriend at 40 I'm killing myself.
Anyways, cures for this depression, spring and summer.
Simply, when you've got all your mates around you, the weathers good, and all you do is go on random trips and play football all the time, life can't be bad.
But of a random post this actually, so I'll summarise by saying I'm depressed for six months of the year because of myself and girls, and extremely happy in the better six months.
I do know if I don't have a wife/girlfriend at 40 I'm killing myself.
I tell you what, girls depress me.
Especially with having a lisp, and effed up teeth. Puts your confidence right off, and means I never say a word when I like a girl. It's a shame really cause I can be really friendly with them, flirting is fine with me cause I can just roll off innuendos on what they say, but if it gets to the point where I decide I actually want to do something with them, the first thing they do thats slightly annoying means I say something about it and end up falling out with them.
That depresses me, especially knowing/thinking it'll always be the same, or maybe it's just a teenage thing?
Makes things worse when your best mates, or other mates get girlfriends, makes the thoughts about the lisp and the teeth ever present in my head, and it's even worse when I go out drinking with them, knowing you're not gonna be noticed by girls, and never feeling bothered to say anything to any of them (though thats alright 'cause meeting and then pulling girls on a night out is simply an ego booster in my eyes)
I do know if I don't have a wife/girlfriend at 40 I'm killing myself.
Anyways, cures for this depression, spring and summer.
Simply, when you've got all your mates around you, the weathers good, and all you do is go on random trips and play football all the time, life can't be bad.
But of a random post this actually, so I'll summarise by saying I'm depressed for six months of the year because of myself and girls, and extremely happy in the better six months.